This Post Rocks

Or rather, this post is about rocks. More specifically about the entertainment value of rocks. You see, a while back Brittany asked me if I would know, theoretically what one would need to do if one wanted to paint rocks. And as luck would have it I do. And I have nothing more interesting to write about at this time. I guess I could write about starting school again but really all there is to say is that 18 credits is ALOT and that I will be done in the summer. So you get to hear about rocks.
For those of you who don't know, for my 20th birthday my roommates and I had a rock painting party where we painted phrases on rocks then secretly scattered them around campus. It turned out to be one of the most random and fun birthday parties I have ever had and walking around campus the next day seeing our handiwork and people's reactions was even more awesome. ("Dude, its another one of those rocks!") Most of them were picked up after a day or two but the next spring walking past the library I saw an orange one that had been overlooked after the first snow and lasted the winter.
I had never given much thought to painting rocks or how random it might be, but since that time, painted rocks have been a recurring theme in my life so I thought I would share a few stories with you.
My first memory of painting rocks comes from primary where our teachers had us paint prayer rocks. The idea was to put the rock under your pillow (or so I thought) so that when you went to bed you would feel the rock underneath and remember to say your prayers. In actuality the idea was probably to put the rock on top of your pillow so that you would see it and remember to say your prayers. This turned out to be an unfortunate mix up as the rock that I painted was roughly the size of a football and significantly heavier. Contrary to what I thought, the rock would not just feel slightly uncomfortable under your pillow but would in fact inflict serious pain to your skull if you had forgotten it was there. Which I did. And nearly gave myself a concussion one night as I dove into bed. I don't remember what happened to that rock (actually there are a lot of things about that time that I don't remember....) but it never did find its way under my pillow again.
You might think that painting rocks would be a sort of juvenile activity and I would probably have agreed with you. So I was surprised to find myself painting rocks once again on my mission in Seattle, at the request of the ward mission leader. He wanted us to give out "reference rocks" (not reverence rocks) to the families in our branch. The idea was to gather some big heavy rocks, paint them hideously and give them to members with the instruction that the only way to rid themselves of said rocks was to give the missionaries a reference of somebody we could teach. I was a little surprised but very glad that I had all the necessary skills for painting rocks.
First we gathered them, and don't worry we did that in full missionary gear- three sisters in skirts and dress shoes lugging rocks into the back of a Toyota Corolla. Then we lugged them up the stairs into our apartment. Well, actually we just tried to do that but we were laughing so hard that we had to stop halfway up and our Russian speaking neighbor who probably thought that we were crazy anyway had to help us drag them up the rest of the way. It was one of those times that I really really wished that I spoke Russian. (Though at the same time I am not really sure there would have been a satisfactory explanation anyway.) Once we were safely in our apartment, with the 75 pound box of rocks we proceeded to wash them in the bathtub with old toothbrushes and then to lay them out on the tiny balcony to dry.
Next came the painting part which we did with spray paint. Construction Cone Orange spray paint. It was about the ugliest color we could think of and made for some pretty hideous rocks. We used magic marker to write "Reference Rock" on them along with a scripture reference and proceeded to give them out to the members.
I ended my mission a few weeks later so I never saw any of the rocks come back with references but always assumed the best had happened. Though upon further reflection I realize that orange may not have been the ugliest color we could have come up with. In fact, a lot of hispanic people really like bright colors, including orange, so the rocks we thought were so hideous may not have had universal Un-appeal. They may even have made great decorative prayer rocks:)
So there you go. Everything I know about painting rocks. You can also use regular craft paint and the best rocks to paint are smooth flat ones. And you can get pretty creative with the messages. Heck you could even set them on the steps of Old Main to propose to your girlfriend:)
Incidentally, since I have become an expert in this medium I have decided to move on to other art forms so if anyone hears of any glass blowing classes please let me know:)